I went to Mahakumbh Mela. This was my experience.

Taking you through all my observations, learnings, and experiences from this literal

I attended the Mahakumbh Mela. I did a 7 day mini spiritual trip across Ayodhya, Prayagraj and Varanasi. Very weirdly, EVERYTHING aligned perfectly on this trip, like the divine wanted us to see him. Or it could have just be pure luck and coincidence. But what if luck is just the divine’s play :)

Everyone asked me why I was going to kumbh, lot of people made fun of me, and as expected people were warning us about the crowd. Of course I was aware about all that. But I just wanted to go experience what it would be like. Because quite literally this is once in a life time experience. It only comes every 144 years. I like to lead myself with curiosity. Once I’m curious it needs to be quenched. I just felt that it would be different, I wasn’t necessarily going for the religious significance behind it. It more curiosity to see what it’s about. I had a theory that The crowd and energy is what makes these experiences feel different. Experience once with a crowd and experience once alone. And honestly I am so glad I went, where will you ever find so many people gathered together for one shared thing. It makes the feeling infectious, it over takes you.

This is a bit unstructured, but here are notes that I will take you through a quick rundown of how it went for us and observations, things I learnt and experienced along the way.

Before we get into that, let me tell you first what is the Maha Kumbh Mela? The Mahakumbh Mela aligns with unique celestial configurations that occur once every 144 years. This rare alignment involves Jupiter, Saturn, the Sun, and the Moon in specific positions relative to Earth. Being in the city of Prayagraj at this time is incredibly powerful for spiritual practices given there is an upsurge of energy due to the astronomical alignment. A dip in the Triveni Sangam (meeting point of the 3 holy rivers) during this time is believed to liberate individuals and their ancestors from the cycle of rebirth, ultimately leading to moksha, or spiritual emancipation. According to Hindu mythology, drops of amrita, the nectar of immortality, fell at the Triveni Sangam during the Samudra Manthan, sanctifying it as a site of divine blessings. The Samudra Manthan, or the Churning of the Ocean of Milk, describes a legendary event where gods and demons joined forces to churn the cosmic ocean in search of amrita.

Now, we started the trip in Ayodhya, the birth place of Lord Ram, and made our way to Prayagraj and then ended in Varanasi. Little mini road trip.

We landed in Ayodhya in the afternoon and took some time rest and freshen up. Our agenda for the day was to visit Ram Mandir. We left the hotel at 4pm, we were only 20 min drive away, but somehow our driver took a wrong turn that got us stuck in a jam for 3 hours, this 20 min drive turned into like 4 hours. We got the temple at 7pm. Honestly I did not think we would even make it. We were stopped multiple times by the police for not having an online voucher. These 2 construction workers helped us get past the line for a darshan, they had absolutely no incentive to, but they literally went above and beyond to get us through, we were stopped 2-3 times by guards questioning us, and these guys persisted to get us in. Somehow, just somehow everything fell into place what felt like a major struggle always ended up being worth it at the end. We got to do darshan 2 times at Ram mandir and that too we made it just in time for Aarti, and my gosh the energy is just different level during Aarti, every noise was just blocked off, I stopped registering that there was a crowd, it was just me and the divine in a room and no one else. It was surreal. It felt like time had stopped when I was inside.

I’m not really a Ram bhakt. Before this, I was trying to understand Ram. Who is Ram? There’s something about him as an energy. Satya Ji mentions Ram as the sound of now. Hes a force in all of us, and he brings a very calming energy. He’s more than just a character from the Ramayana. I felt so much energy and love oozing out of me when I saw him. Being part of such a large crowd, where everyone was there with love for Ram, the energy was something else. So much chaos, yet in that chaos, there was bliss. Everyone was in tune with each other. It was beautiful. I am so grateful to have experienced this, truly blessed that everything went smoothly without much hassle.

The key was being there, present, with pure love and no expectations. I just came and existed alongside. Btw these construction workers were with us the whole time guiding us through, even did the darshan with us. After we did the darshan they were so passionately explaining what they were building at the ram mandir and all out of genuine intention. We wanted to tip them, but they REFUSED to take any money, they kept saying “we are doing this out of love, we see you people as family, this is our seva” they did not take a single dollar and that also went with everyone working at the temple, no one accepted any tips, they were doing it all as seva. This was really shocking to me, I have never seen anything like this at a temple, especially in the south. This is the type of humanity I wish to see more of. You know what makes me emotional, seeing people acting out of selflessness. It’s so hard to find that in this world of deceitfulness and selfishness. When I see people like this, good intention makes me have hope again in humanity.

The next day, we tried to visit the Hanuman temple but couldn’t make it due to the massive crowd. Instead, we prayed at a small Hanuman temple nearby. The Hanuman temple seemed to have more rush than the Ram Mandir. This crowd was different, everyone had different agendas, going in different directions, but still it didn’t feel overwhelming. It’s like we all were in it together finding our ways.

Ayodhya as a city is more underdeveloped than I expected. But still it was so beautiful, the entire Ramayana was painted through the city, on every wall, as you drive through the city, you watch the entire story unfold, wall after wall. Apart from the beautiful paintings, I thought with the construction of Ram mandir, Modi would help develop the city more. It’s a tier 2 city, looking more like a village with really poor infrastructure. Maybe it’s supposed to be that way and I have a biased view because the city isn’t meant to handle such massive crowd, so it really pushed its limit. Still It’s sad to see. For a city that was once a rich kingdom, Lord Ram would have had a heart attack if he saw what his kingdom looks like now. And the way the locals treat it—throwing trash, poorly treated cows, taking advantage of the land—it’s heartbreaking. It’s such a holy city; it deserves more respect.

Journey to Prayagraj:

We left Ayodhya at 11 PM for Prayagraj. It was supposed to take 3.5 hours, but it took 7. What an adventure. At 2 AM, we somehow ended up in a remote village, passing through dirt roads in complete darkness. At 3 AM, we, 5 women, stopped for roadside chai full of truckies, IN UP, we fully could’ve gotten kidnapped lol. By 5 AM, we reached Prayagraj, but the traffic was insane. It took us 2 hours to navigate 5 km. Once again, it all worked out in the end. We just made it in time for sunrise. Perfect timing. It was a beautiful sight. Also the boat harbor that takes you to triveni sangam was not crowded. We hopped on a boat that took us to the point at Triveni sangam where we had to dip. The Triveni sangam is the point where the 3 holy rivers meet, Ganga, Saraswati and Yamuna. It’s said dipping here will increase your spiritual receptivity and cleanse all your karma so your soul attains moksha. We got lucky that the boat driver took us to such a good spot. Where there wasn’t much crowd and it was super clean. I was ONCE AGAIN shocked at how smooth this was for us, given the endless horror stories people have told us about the journey to have their kumbh dip experience. We had no expectations going into this trip.

The Triveni Sangam dip felt powerful. Was it the energy of the Sangam or just the water flow? Would I have felt the same thing dipping into any other river? I don’t know. But I felt something. Not sure if I will attain moksha and all that, but the dip was unique.

The next day we explored more of the Mahakumbh. It was intense. It’s like everywhere you look there was people and it goes so far till the end of your eyesight, everywhere you look, crowd. You’ll see all the extremes, everyone's unique expression of their connection to Sanatan Dharma, and it was so amazing to witness. Sanatan Dharma itself is so vast, with so many different paths that people follow, yet they all lead to the same higher goal. Seeing all those different followings come together in one place was incredible. In one corner there are the aghoris meditating, another corner you will find Vaishanavas singing, Ram Bhakti chanting. It was so cool to see.

I know I’m talking about the crowd a lot, but honestly it was just so crazy to see that many people. It’s not like any crowd. I’ve been to concerts with endless amount of people and it’s not the same. There was something weirdly different about it. The crowd was ridiculous yet organized. The crowd is what made this whole experience unique and worth it. The chaos, the devotion, together it all felt powerful. A sense of community. Organized chaos. Respect amidst the pushing and shoving. Not once did I even see any sort of lustful gazes, just immense devotion.

Every moment of the day you will see groups of people walking with all their luggage, camping out on the roadsides, people travel days on days on foot, walking endless kilometers from their villages to attend this, with no where to stay, that level of determination is inspiring. I hope they all get the blessings they deserve. At Kashi vishwanath, I saw people being turned away, people who have travelled so far from their villages and didn’t know the temple required a pass to get in. They pleaded, police office got aggressive with them and told them to get out, the head man of the village told the group “it’s okay guys we will come again tomorrow morning” the disappointment obviously was there, but with smiling faces they went back. It kinda just stabbed me. Always look at the positive. Was kind of a stab also to just reflect, here we were, comfortably traveling, getting through everywhere with ease, what we call as struggle is nothing compared to what these people go through. It makes you really appreciate the smallest luxuries you have in life.

It was so cool to see how everyone in the city was benefiting, the boat men, taxi drivers, everyone was making business. Win win. It was such a beautiful representation of culture, music performances everywhere, dance performances, meditation, spiritual talks, prayer, etc. I found Prayagraj as a city to be quite beautiful, so many paintings all over town, paintings of culture, its so beautiful.

The traffic in Prayagraj was like jaw dropping, cars completely stuck in crowds of people, most of the roads were shut down, we were hopping on the back of motorcycles to take us to certain points. It was such an adventure. 6 of us in one auto, im like half falling outside sitting next the autqodriver, in the moment it was quite scary, but the adventure was so fun. Honestly big props to the police handling this, managing this crowd is not easy, at certain points it got so bad that the army had to step in, there were army vehicles everywhere. What also really shocked me was learning that The festival lasted 45 days, over 660 million visitors. Despite the massive footfall, and all the news about the fecal bacteria in the water, there is no sign of any disease outbreak, how is it possible. Things like this make you believe that the energy is real.

But seeing how people treat these holy rivers makes me mad. You call this river holy, yet you throw garbage in it? You spit in it? Do people not realize they are harming it? If they truly revered these rivers, there would be strict measures in place, no littering, heavy fines for spitting, etc. But nothing like that exists. It seems like the government doesn’t care either. I even saw a dead cow and its calf floating in the Ganga river. The basic decency would be to burn or bury the bodies, not just throw them in the water.

Kashi - Varanasi - Benares ( 3 different names, one city)

Kashi is a very special city for a lot of people. Let me give a quick background as to why. Kashi is said to be one of the oldest living cities in the world. It’s said to be sitting on top of Shiva’s Trishul. The idea is that since the city is held on Shiva's trident, it remains unaffected by worldly destruction. Lord Shiva declared:

"Even if the world is destroyed, Kashi will remain standing." According to mythology, when Shiva performed his cosmic dance of destruction (Tandava), Kashi remained untouched, symbolizing its transcendence beyond the cycle of creation and destruction. This belief ties into the idea that Kashi is not just a physical place but a divine, spiritual realm, a space where the soul can find liberation, regardless of worldly turmoil.

Kashi is such an interesting space. It’s so addictive? For some reason there is also something about it that’s mysterious. Why do I feel Kashi to be similar to me as a person. Mysterious, playful when it wants to be, and spiritually rooted. Is this why I am so addicted to it? I think Kashi is a city that adapts itself to the person that experiences it. It’s a mirror. Maybe that’s why most people are drawn to it. I am so fascinated by it. There is so much depth to it. It’s a rabbit hole. People say Kashi calls you, you can’t just go whenever you want, you go only when it calls you. When I landed in Kashi, “AUM Namah Shivaya” was chanting in my mind, loudly, sometimes unconsciously. There’s something addictive about that place, and I can’t pinpoint why. Maybe it’s the spiritual significance and history.

I loved exploring the ghats and the gullys. Theres a lot of stories in them, you can just get lost exploring the gullys and form your own story. Any gullys you explore in Varanasi you will find something intriguing. Each house has underground shivling temples, below the ground. Closed off to the public but you can see them from afar. You can see a lot of them are a bit damaged from the attack from the Mughals. Its so amazing to still see them standing thought and continuing to be worshipped. I wandered through the gullies and found Lahiri Mahasaya’s Jeevan Samadhi. It’s in the middle of a random alley where people walk past daily, unaware. I stepped in, and the energy inside was insane. I sat in Lahiri Mahasya’s samadhi, and it felt the need to ask him “me sitting here feels like you have called me and I have found my way to you here, Please guide me to clarity to know what my dharma is so I can act upon it”. I hope to find my clarity soon.

Some days I will just sit or when meditating random clarity start to hit me. Things like this just hit at random times and you will never see it coming. For some reason lately I have been feeling lost. I don’t know what my life’s purpose is, or what I should act on Do I have a dharma? If so what is it? It’s so weird for me to reflect on how passionate and proactive I was on building things, working on ideas, problems in college and school, and now the desire to do that is slowly falling. Usually I am very clear on what I want to do, and now not knowing that is scary. I have a job, and I like it, but there is still a part of me thot feels lost, I want something of my own, something bigger. When I sat in Lahiri Mahsaya’s abode, I asked for more clarity. I like what I am doing, but I feel I have not yet tapped into my full potential.

Whenever I visit temples, I am never really asking for anything. I am just there connecting with the presence, with the energy. Oozing out love and admiration. Invoking the energy within me. The one thing that I only ask for is guidance. I am always asking them to guide from darkness to light. From unclaity to clarity. Help me understand what is my purpose, my dharma, so I can start to act on it. Yes spirituality is one part, but I was born in to this world, I can’t not do anything, might as well be useful and provide something back.

Sometimes I see these aghoris and wonder. What do they think their life purpose is. They have mostly renounced themselves from the material world, then what is it that keeps them to wake up everyday to take on the day. Maybe that is something I should’ve asked them. The aghoris are so fascinating, they are super scary but they hold such immense powers. Aghoris are extreme worshippers of the fierce form of shiva, Bhairava. They have a unique set of practice. Their detachment from worldly desires allows them to channel their focus entirely on spiritual mastery. Aghoris are known to embrace practices that challenge societal norms — meditating in cremation grounds, consuming substances considered impure, eating human flesh, etc. This extreme path is believed to strip away fear, ego, and attachment, empowering them to connect deeply with divine energies. Their intense sadhana involves powerful mantras, rituals, and meditation techniques that are said to unlock extraordinary mental and spiritual strength. People asked me what the Aghoris were like, and I couldn’t stop thinking about them. They’re just so intriguing. I wanted to talk to them, to understand what drives them when they’ve let go of so much. They carry so much knowledge, knowledge that society often rejects or mocks just because it doesn’t fit into what’s considered ‘normal.’

Kashi ghats are so amazing. There are the ghats like Manikarnika and Harishchandra ghat where bodies are being burnt, you will see that on your left and on your right will be people bathing in the water to cleanse themself . On one side someone is leaving the world, the right side someone is embracing life, seeking purity. You will see the entire life to death circle in Kashi. I wanted to see Manikarnika ghat closer, my mom didn’t really allow me, apparently young unmarried girls should not go, the soul could enter young girls bodies. They actually blocked off the ghat with some walls also, because of an incident that happened last month of a girl who went there and ended getting possessed. Usually I wouldn’t listen and still go anyway. And I actually did go, I went and I actually felt a very negative energy, almost like I was suffocating, I took that as a sign and didn’t go closer, I just watched from a far, its hard to explain the feeling of being there in this atmosphere.

Varanasi is known for its 2 famous shiva temples. Kaal Bhaiarav and Kashi Vishwanath. Of course during the time of Mahashivratri, celebration of the great night of shiva, the city gets absolutely packed. Varanasi is a city that has narrow roads and streets, it’s not built to handle this sort of crowd.

We went first to Kaal Bhaiarav’s temple He is known to be super fierce version of shiva. Think Maa Kali’s form but for Shiva. There is a fierce energy one is supposed to feel when entering Kaal Bhairav’s abode. Like I mentioned before, somehow last minute we would finesse a way in without having to stand the 6 hour queues. Last minute a connection came through and he took us straight through. Passing by the 5 hour queue. While normally one would feel relieved. I felt guilty. So much guilt as I was walking past everyone and seeing in their eyes the unfairness they felt. As they rightfully should feel. Im not better than them, why should I get this treatment. The guilt was overruling me, when I got in to the temple. It was crazy packed. Bone crushing, no space to move, you have to shove your way through. Now I have no idea what kaal Bhairav looks like, I just know the concept of Kaal Bhaiarav, the guy took us into this mini abode, and I turn and see this idol of a fierce man, I was thinking this was another small temple that comes on the way before the actual Kaal Bhairav abode, but then I turn right and see the long darshan queue viewing the idol from a bit afar. Then I realized I am literally standing in Kaal Bhairav’s abode, right in front with the priests, I could touch Kaal Bhaiarav. This is the first time I stepped into a fierce abode and didn’t feel the energy. Of course I paid my respects and prayed, but I could not feel the energy and connect with him, because my guilt was overtaking me. First I cut the whole line, and now I am having a very special darshan? Why do I deserve this. When we left. I tried to rationale with myself. Maybe this is Mahadev’s wish, his wish for me to see him up close specially. Otherwise how could everything work out so last minute like this? With that reasoning I followed through next to Kashi Vishwanathan. This time, I was in the right mindset. The guilt was still there, but I managed to rationalize it. I am lucky to have this opportunity, let me be grateful, perhaps it’s his wish to give me a smooth darshan. Let me follow what is already given to me instead of questioning it. When the guy took us to kashi Vishwanath, the moment I stepped in a wave of energy this over took me, I was buzzing. That temple is powerful. It’s like no one else was in that temple but me and him. The idol itself is so tiny, and that too you dont even know where its sitting, your walking and walking and you get to see it for like .1 second. The idol is there, the point is you connect with the energy. Connecting with that one energy, that one consciousness, Aum Namah Shivaya. I felt so refreshed after that. In hindsight it’s so draining being in that crowd but for the .5 seconds ur there in his presence, nothing else in the world matters, you are suddenly revived.

The next day was Mahashivratri. We were on a fruit fast the whole day and night.

Mahashivratri in Kashi was interesting. The streets were full of celebrations for Shiva and Parvati’s marriage. There were parties literally everywhere, music blasting through the streets. I hoped to see meditations on the ghats, but there weren’t many. Everyone celebrates differently. Bhaang was everywhere—Shiv Ji’s prasad. I didn’t take it. Chickened out. Maybe next time. We did abhishekams to Shivlings throughout the city, respecting the divine in our own way. I stayed up the whole night, we went to meditate at the ghats around 1am, but got attacked by mosquitos. The whole city was up at night.

While most of this trip went smoothly. There were a couple things I had missed on my list, which I took as a sign that Kashi is calling me back to come again. My 2 ancestral homes are there, I looked for them one day, but couldn’t find them, and the Ganga Aarti, the main thing, and really the only thing I actually wanted to see in this entire trip I didn’t get to see. It was shut down due to the crowd. Its so funny, everything I did not expect, I got, but the one thing I wanted, I didn’t. I also would love to just explore the city without a massive crowd. More solitude to take everything in.

Another crazy thing happened. I was a bit concerned for this trip because it falls during the week I am supposed to get my period. If a girl is on their period, they are not allowed to enter the temple. If I got my period during the trip I wouldn’t have been allowed to enter any of the temples and honestly I would be super disappointed if that happened. I was literally crossing my finger that it wouldn’t come. Usually I have quite regular periods and it never gets delayed. This trip was for a week. The very last day of this trip was Mahashivratri. Mahashivratri ended at 6am. At 6:10 am my period came. Correctly after I finished the whole trip and Shivratri. It was literally god saying “I need you to see me, your period can wait” It was so crazy.

Time was also moving weirdly for me. Its like I was just existing, nothing was bothering me. I feel like a void. It feels weird, but I also feel present?

Returning to Bangalore, everything hit me. Sometimes, you need solitude to process experiences. This trip deepened my trust in the divine. This trip changed something in me. I have a call to stay grounded in my practices, continue to be open-minded, follow my instincts, be more risk-taking, be more trusting in the universe, go with the flow, see the world through a non-judgmental lens. The material world is so temporary. There’s something more, something deeper, something more meaningful. I want to tap into that.

And now, I wait for clarity to find what I am meant to do next.

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Below are a few pics:

painting of the Samudhra Manthan

aghori conducting a ritual

Lahiri Mahasya’s Jivan Samadhi

Aghori smearing ash on his body

Cremation at Manikarnika Ghat

lol when 6 of us sat in an auto

My dip in the triveni sangam